The Journey

Rachael CrowMenopause, Musings, Workshops

While I was away on the Welsh Isle of Enlli I attended a short writing workshop hosted by the “artists in residence” who were a group of poets, writers and photographers. We took part in a few different writing warm up practices- one of them in which we were given a paper boat and we wrote where we were going on the sails, who we were with on our boat and what we were taking with us….mine began with going to the otherworlds, with crow and owl and on my boat i had offerings for the Earth….and so my story began to unfold…

I’m on a journey, and ever unfolding journey. Sailing the waters of life with Crow and Owl as my guides, I have my offerings to the Great Mother and i leave them along the trail for others to glean hope from.

“This too will pass” She whispers in my ears, “all will be well”, “Keep following the lights, I’m lighting the way for you…..”

But there are times when all seems dark, I cannot hear the call of Crow or the hoot of Owl, no lights lie ahead. So i sit in my cave, deep in the aloneness of the dark, reaching out all of my senses to feel Her, to feel my sisters, holding me in their hearts as I take this journey, for myself and for them.

I will be strong and positive, this is The Womens Journey, Initiation to Wise Woman, this is what it is to be alive in a womans body- enjoying the ebbs and flows of our cycle, taking solace in the sleepless nights- these opportunities for deep processing, reading books into the early hours of the morning, breathing with each heat surge and feeling my body being cleansed of all that i no longer need.

In the deep darkness of the cave I feel lost and broken, no longer able to stir up the power of this threshold, I’m abandoned by Her voice, I’m lonely and scared. The voices in my head are driving me insane.

A flapping passes my face, Crow is here, pecking away at the rotten flesh of my life- no longer needed, the energetic blockages and baggage that I’ve carried my whole life and since I wont let them go, Crow pecks and pecks to loosen my grip on the energetic threads binding me.

Ah, Her soothing voice comes, “let go, let go, It’s alright, it’s safe to let go.”

I surrender to Crow and the soothing voice of the Mother, and i become aware of wise Owl residing in my womb space, gently reminding me my wisdom is inside me, in my womb. I drop down into my womb and feel the comfort of my inner wise woman and eventually fall into a deep peaceful sleep.

Tomorrow I will have the strength to continue the journey.